If you’ve never bought a sex toy before, the whole world of them can feel a bit much — a thousand shapes, silly names, and nobody actually explaining anything. So let’s start right at the beginning, no assumptions, no awkwardness. This is the friendly overview we wish everyone got handed on day one.
First things first: this is completely normal
Sex toys aren’t a niche or a last resort — they’re used by people of every age, relationship status and gender, happily and often. They’re not a comment on you or your partner. They’re just a way to feel good, explore what you enjoy, and add a bit of fun. That’s the whole story. Curiosity is the only qualification required.
The main families, in plain English
Almost everything falls into a handful of groups. Knowing them makes the shop far less overwhelming:
- External stimulators — bullets, clitoral “suction” toys and wands, focused on outside stimulation. The friendliest starting point.
- Internal toys — G-spot vibrators, dildos and prostate massagers, designed to be inserted.
- Rabbits & dual toys — do internal and external at once.
- Toys for him — strokers, rings and prostate massagers.
- Couples’ toys — wearable vibes, cock rings and remote-controlled bits, meant to be used together.
- Essentials — lube (buy some, honestly), toy cleaner, storage, and playful extras.
The one bit of jargon that matters: “body-safe”
You’ll see the phrase everywhere and it’s the only spec worth memorising. Body-safe means non-porous, non-toxic materials — chiefly silicone, glass and stainless steel — that don’t harbour bacteria and are safe against skin. Cheaper “jelly” or vaguely-labelled materials can be porous and irritating. When in doubt, silicone is your friend.
How to choose your very first toy
- Start simple and external. A bullet or a clitoral toy tells you loads about what you like, for very little money.
- Go rechargeable — stronger, quieter, no battery panic.
- Don’t overspend on day one. A £15–£30 first toy is plenty to learn your preferences.
- Grab lube while you’re at it. It genuinely makes everything better.
Still not sure? Let us do the thinking
You don’t have to wade through a thousand products alone — that’s rather the point of Tuppence. Tell us a little about what you’re after and we’ll point you at the handful actually worth your while.
Common questions
✦ What sex toy should I buy first?
For most people, a simple external clitoral toy or a versatile bullet. Start simple, learn what you like, then branch out — or let the Find Your Thing quiz narrow it down.
✦ Are sex toys safe to use?
Yes, when they’re body-safe (medical-grade silicone) and kept clean. Avoid porous “jelly” materials — see our care guide.
✦ What does “body-safe” mean?
Non-porous, non-toxic materials — chiefly medical-grade silicone — that won’t harbour bacteria or leach chemicals. It’s the single most important thing to check.
✦ How discreet is delivery?
Completely. Plain, unbranded packaging and tracked UK delivery — nothing on the box gives it away.