A dildo is the most straightforward toy there is — no motors, no charging, just you setting the pace and depth. That simplicity is exactly the appeal. Here’s how to choose one and enjoy it.
Choose before you use
- Size honestly. Go by what you already enjoy, not what looks impressive. You can always size up later; starting too big just puts you off.
- Material. Body-safe silicone is soft and forgiving; glass is firm and great for temperature play. Both are non-porous and easy to clean.
- A suction base is a quiet superpower — it sticks to a wall, floor or the side of the bath for hands-free play.
Getting started
- Warm up first. Don’t go straight in — arousal makes everything easier and more pleasurable.
- Lube generously. Water-based works with every material; if you’ve got a silicone toy, skip silicone lube (it can degrade it — see our lube guide).
- Find your angle. A gentle curve aimed towards the front wall is how most people find the G-spot or prostate. Slow, shallow strokes first.
With a partner
A dildo is lovely in a partner’s hand, and a harness turns one into a strap-on for shared play. Communication and lube do the rest — let the receiving partner steer pace and depth.
Common questions
✦ How do I use a dildo for the first time?
Warm up, use plenty of water-based lube, and start with slow, shallow strokes at a comfortable angle. There’s no rush — you’re in complete control.
✦ What size dildo should a beginner get?
Choose by what you already comfortably enjoy, not by looks. Starting smaller and sizing up later is far better than starting too big. Browse dildos.
✦ Can I use a dildo hands-free?
Yes — a suction-cup dildo sticks to a firm surface (wall, floor, bath) so you can straddle or lean into it hands-free. A harness lets a partner wear one.